Questions

This morning's sermon in church was so incredible, I had to come home a write it down so I didn't forget any points. I mean, it's one of those sermons that felt like God Himself had orchestrated just for me. So let me get right to it....

The text today came from Psalm 13.
     How long will you forget me, Lord? Forever? How long will you hide from me?
     How long must I worry and feel sad in my heart all day? How long will my enemy win over me?
     Lord, look at me. Answer me, my God; tell me or I will die.
     Otherwise my enemy will say, "I have won!"   Those against me will rejoice that I've been defeated.
     I trust in your love. My heart is happy because you have saved me.
     I sing to the Lord because he has taken care of me.

This is a psalm of lament. You know, sadness, grief and the like. My bible says that David wrote this one. He is clearly in pain. He's questioning God...where are you? How long are you going to let this go on? How long are you going to let the bad guys win?

Y'all this is the point where it gets real for me. Growing up, I went to a church that taught that you didn't question God. He is the almighty and we are to just obey. While I still believe that we are to obey, I have always struggled with the questioning part. I am FILLED with more questions than answers...about everything. I always thought that God wouldn't have created my mind in the way He did if He hadn't intended for me to question things. But then I would feel guilty and revert back to my upbringing. Don't question..just follow.

But this psalm (with the help of my pastor) brought things into a different light. We can question God and wonder and hurt and cry, if we just remember to ask His help over these things. Our pastor pointed out that there are four main points to this type of prayer.

   1. "Dear God"- I don't have to butter up God to get His attention. I don't have to lavish praises on Him just to get Him to hear me. All I have to do is speak His name. He hears my words but also knows my heart. Just calling on Him is enough to have His ear.
  2. "We are in pain"- It's ok to have the questions, to pour out our concerns, to ask God why these bad things are happening in our world. We are hurting here and it's fine for us to tell it all to God. He knows it anyway. His heart is moved by what is in our hearts.
  3. "Help!" - So we've told God all of the things we are struggling with. We've laid out our hearts before the King and we just ask for His help. Acknowledging that He is the only one who can do anything about it....well, that's what it's all about.
   4. "We trust you"--Taking the hurts in one hand and His hope in the other and laying them at the feet of Jesus....saying to God that we believe He is in charge and will help us.

Our pastor made another point that stands out with me so clearly. He said praying in this way is a form of worship. Worship. Isn't that amazing? Getting heart to heart with God is worship. Pouring out your very soul to him is worship. Asking for His help is worship. Trusting Him is worship.

 While singing praises and proclaiming God's greatness is also worship, having that deep, heartfelt connection with the King of Kings is the ultimate worship. Because we all know that there are times when our praise is just lip service. We say it because we "should" or because it's what we have been taught or because it's that part of the church service. But our desperate hearts crying out to God, believing Him and trusting Him to help us is always truth. There's no greater worship than honesty between you and your King.

Who knows where these cries lead? We know God is moved by our hearts. Maybe this cry, this outpouring, this pleading of genuine dependence is what will move God.  To quote our pastor, "The cries initiate history."

Father, today I thank you for sending this word to me. In this one sermon, you have answered so many questions for me. You gave me answers about myself but also about you. Please help me to remember this as I move forward in my walk with you.

Today, as I am struggling with so many things, I thank you for listening. I thank you for hearing my heart and feeling my pain. Please help me in this battle. Even more, please help me in turning this battle over to you, for it is your fight anyway.  In my hands are both the problem and your hope. I trust you with them and lay them at your feet. Please help me this very day. I love you my sweet Lord.