Power of Praise

I'm linked to a few devotional type web sites. They generally send some points to ponder each day. This week's theme has been praise. How to praise God, where to praise God, when to praise God.....

My problem is that I don't feel like praising God. I am struggling. A man is in a hospital room dying of cancer. I don't want to praise God while this man and his family suffer.

The miracle I've prayed for, for almost 3 years now, hasn't happened yet. I don't want to praise God while I wait.

The job I was told was mine has changed. The terms are different and I don't know what to do about it. I don't want to praise God while I weigh my options.

I know the Bible says to praise Him. It says He is worthy. It says He is in control of it all, so we are to praise Him in His wisdom. But I'm struggling. I don't want to praise Him and feel fake, when what I really want to do is cry. And ask "WHY???" I don't want to pretend to love His wisdom when it doesn't match what I want for my life or the life of others I see. I don't want to be a hypocrite, opening my mouth to give Him praise when inside I don't really feel it.

I've heard that this is faith...you do things sometimes even though you don't see evidence. Right now I don't see evidence. I can look outside and see the sun shining and the flowers blooming and I know God is here and I can praise Him for that. But can I truly, honestly praise Him for these struggles while I'm in the middle of them?

I can look back and see struggles in the past, that I can now praise God for. They have shaped me in ways I could not have imagined. And I can say that although I never want to go through them again, I am honestly thankful for the lessons learned. But did I praise God in the midst of them? I doubt it.

So what do I do? I read a quote that says "God doesn't tell you to thank him for the negative circumstances. He says to thank Him while you're in the midst of them. Doing this shows that you trust Him to bring you out." So do I really, really trust Him to bring me (and others ) out? Or is it lip service?

Sometimes this walk is hard and more complex than I want to give thought to. And although it sounds like I am taking both sides of an argument, I cannot imagine walking this road without God.

I can go to Him with these questions. I can talk to Him and ask what to do. He made me with this inquisitive mind. He gave me the guts to go boldly before Him and ask Him what the deal is. He allows me to grieve a perceived unfairness, get angry at a perceived injustice and cry at a perceived situation unraveling before me. He is the only one who can bring justice, make it fair and knit the situation back together. He is the only one who can calm the storm raging in my heart.

So I turn to Him. I do thank Him for His love, His patience, His kindness to me. I do praise Him for my beautiful family, the joy of being a mother, and the privilege of being His child. And I ask Him for help with the rest...........