God's grace

There are so many events to catch you up on. This past week has been a whirlwind to say the least. So to put it in a bit of chronological order for you..............

I got sick. Gross, throw up, fever, can't swallow, feeling dizzy kind of sick. At the time, it felt like the worst possible week to get sick. There was a huge event on Thursday that I could not miss. On top of my regular duties as teacher and mom, if there ever was a week not to be down with illness, this was it. But looking back on it, I think God chose this week for sickness on purpose. No time to be nervous or worry when you are sick. There is just no energy left for it. I can honestly say, "Thank you God for allowing this sickness to come when it did." 

Being sick also brought out the nurturing side of G. He brought me a drink when I needed it, checked on me often and even put his hand to my forehead to see if I had a fever. "Oh, honey.......", he said when I felt hot. This is one sweet kid!

So I obviously made it through the funk and went on to my Thursday. I won't give you all of the details, but the truth is that God has walked with us through Hell for about five years and he is showing us the other side. I know there is more, the enemy is not done with us yet, but for the first time in a long time I can see the light. I've had my doubts, that's no secret, but I can look back on it and see God's hand all along. Wouldn't it be nice if we had foresight also!

The temperament has really changed around our house this week also. I know that kids feel tension too and with Mom being sick, it throws even the best laid plans out of whack. But in our house, things have a totally different vibe. Cleaning usually brings out the whines and moans of procrastination. Not today. Today, my G. worked right along side of me. He wanted to organize, straighten and clean with me. He was a great help. I don't know if I can even adequately put it into words. It wasn't the chores that were done, it was the way they were done. With joy and love.

God's grace and mercy has been shown to me in so many ways in just a few days' time. Words are not enough, but they are all I have. Thank you God.

Words of Blessing

It seems as though most of my posts come from something I've learned in church or something I'm angry at. Tonight is no exception. God once again used both the sermon and the worship time to speak to me.

Our sermon series has been on blessing...how we get it, why we have it, how we handle it....all the aspects of blessing. Today specifically was on words and how they relate to blessing. There were so many points that I'm still thinking through but one is resounding loud in clear in my heart and mind. It was what to do when evil or wrongdoing confronts us. What comes out of our mouths in response? When someone hurls insults at us do we sling them back? When someone tells a lie toward us do we get angry? When someone gossips about our family do we dig up the dirt on them?

I am so guilty of letting my emotions fly right out of my mouth instead of biting my tongue. It's evident in my posts too. But our pastor made a really good point....if we lash out and give back the hatred and evil that was sent our way, we allow that hatred to penetrate into us. We give it energy. We continue the cycle of bitterness.

That cycle continues until we choose to put a stop to it. If we can speak blessing, as we are called to do, then it turns the cycle around. We aren't allowing that evil to soak into our spirit. We are basically deflecting it.

It's definitely easier said than done. So today I pray for God's guidance. I pray for wisdom to know what to say (or what not to say) during those times. I want my heart to be filled with joy and peace, not hatred or bitterness. I do believe that God can heal me and help me to control my tongue. Help me Lord to bless those that persecute me. Not because I want to, but because You told me to.